Stealing the food from our mouths

Despite having created the name Gambba-Jones in 1992, by combining our family surname and a part of my wife’s grandfather’s family name, it seems we are not alone. As well as Linda, myself and our two grown-up kids, there now appears to be as many as five more in the area – or maybe not.

On Sunday we went out for lunch with five friends. Curiously, when we got to the restaurant a family group, complete with a not particularly adorable baby – very noisy – had arrived shortly before us and claimed to be us. This was done by pointing to our name on the booking sheet and saying, ‘that’s us’. From that point on, or at least until we arrived, they were the Gambba-Jones party. Unfortunately, for the restaurant owner, our arrival and reclaiming of the name did not ring any alarm bells for and the interlopers were not confronted.

Having enjoyed an excellent lunch we asked for the bill, it was at this point the real reason for earlier identity theft was revealed. Apparently, the counterfeit Gambba-Jones’s had, little by little, drifted away leaving their bill unpaid. First the woman left with the baby, claiming it needed changing. This was followed by a further two members of the party going outside, ‘for a smoke’. The remainders then just slipped away, without the staff realising that all of the cuckoos had now flown the nest.

A warning for all those providing services up front and before any payment is received, if you get a customer, or customers, claiming to be each other, check it out!

LibDems Abusers Charter

The LibDems seem to be the Swap Party, given their swap from being Liberals to LibDems whenever that was; their swap from being an opposition party into being a party in government and now they appear keen to champion the swapping of one set of what they see as abusers for another.  Once a liberal lefty, touchy feely type, always a liberal lefty, etc, etc.

This time they want to rid the world of cowboy wheel clampers, who abuse ‘innocent’ motorists by clamping them when they park of private land.  Of course, if these people didn’t park on the private land in the first place, because they are either too lazy, or too tight to use a fee paying car park, they wouldn’t get clamped.  So now, instead of the clampers being the abusers, it will be these drivers abusing owners of private land.

The LibDems have also decided that the use of Criminal Record checks, for those with access to children and vulnerable adults, will no longer be needed for those with only occasional access.  CRB checks are a costly overhead for those organisations needing to put people through the process, but a very worthwhile one when you think of the irreparable damage done to a child that has been sexually abused.  Now some of those people, who were apparently being abused by this requirement, will be free once again to become potential abusers.

CCTV and official snooping in general, is also to be curbed.  This will allow those who get caught doing things they shouldn’t, but are having their civil liberties abused when spotted doing wrong, will be able to rob, assault or defraud the taxpayers to their hearts content, safe in the knowledge that, even if taken to task, there will be no CCTV or video evidence to back up the attempted prosecution, because that would have been an abuse of their civil liberties.

If I were the suspicious type, which of course I am, I could find myself wondering what all those LibDems who have been bending Cleegie’s ear about this issue, have got to hide?